Feeling lost is an exhausting experience. Facing the reality of your situation seems like an impossible task and so, instead, you suppress your fears. Over the weeks, months, or even years, the constant pit in your stomach, the overwhelming anxiety, and the lingering self-doubt become so familiar that imagining anything else feels like a fantasy.

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

I recently shared The Epic Guide to Career Transitions which discussed how to tactically shift from corporate work into freelancing, however, it does not speak to the emotional journey that leads to that decision.

Feeling lost in life compared to your peers who are seemingly killing it on every level is isolating and embarrassing. It feels as if your friends are on the path to success and you are floating in space, moving further and further away from the life you desire.

It might even feel like time is running out.

Trust me, it’s not. It is never too late to start something new.

Facing dissatisfaction, accepting a need for change, and diving into the unknown is a long and difficult experience. It involves a sense of grief for your current life, and a tremendous amount of courage to try and find a new path.

But it is all worth it to end up on a path that you feel good about.

There are things you can do to feel better, and there are steps to bring you back down to earth. Use this guide to navigate through the experience of feeling lost, alone, and confused and find the strength to invest in yourself and your future.

Facing Reality

Suppressing your dissatisfaction with life because you are afraid of the consequences is only going to make things worse. At some point, you will have to face the reality of your situation. And I have a feeling it won’t be as world-shattering as you think it will be.

It’s important to sit with your feelings and explore what is causing you to feel this way. Most likely, there is one area of your life where you are lacking in fulfilment. This may be personal or professional, and likely has a root cause.

Try going on a solo walk with the sole intention of understanding exactly how you’re feeling. Try reflecting on the following prompts:

• What do you like about your life?
• What is causing you the most stress right now?
• If you had no responsibilities, how would you change your life tomorrow?
• What is stopping you from making those changes?
• What changes are possible to make today?

This process can take time and be emotional. Be kind to yourself, but also be honest. Nothing can improve until you know what needs to change.

Defining Your Wants and Needs

Feeling lost typically derives from a lack of fulfilment. A person’s situation is not satisfying all of their emotional, financial, and physical needs, and as a result, they develop a deep sense of dread. You know you cannot continue on your current path but have no idea which direction to choose instead.

It’s critical to consider what is missing from your current situation, so you know what to look for in your next move. Without intentionally choosing a route that better aligns with your interests, desires, and needs, you risk repeating the same situation all over again.

Take some time to explore what your dream life would look like. Start with these five questions, ideally by writing down your answers so you can return to them later on.

1. What are three things in your current situation that you would like to stay the same?
2. What are three things that need to change?
3. Why?
4. List these six elements in order of priority.
5. What needs to change for your life to align with these priorities?

Reflect on your answers. Make sure they feel true to you. Can you draw any conclusions from what you have written?

Building Actionable Goals

By identifying what needs to change for you to achieve your ideal situation is the first step in creating an action plan to achieve it. Feeling lost can be a result of not being able to see a clear path ahead of you to change.

Creating short and long-term goals will change that.

The short-term goals will act like fence posts, guiding you along the path towards those larger, long-term targets. In other words, instead of creating a dream life and making decisions randomly to try and achieve it, smaller goals work to create actionable steps guaranteed to push you in the right direction.

To do this, use the SMART Goals framework. this stands for

• Specific
• Measurable
• Achievable
• Relevant
• Time-bound

SMART Goals set you up for success in a quantifiable way by creating a timeline and keeping you on track for repeatable wins. Here are some examples of SMART Goals compared to non-SMART goals:

• Find 50 new client leads in the next 2 months vs Gain new clients
• Apply to 10 new jobs this week vs Get a new job
• Reach out to 3 recruiters today vs Start interviewing at new companies
• Spend 10 hours researching new careers over the next month vs Change industries

The SMART Goals give you very clear and actionable instructions to start making changes immediately, versus non-SMART Goals that feel flimsy and much harder to quantifiably achieve.

Start by creating three SMART Goals that you can begin implementing this week.

Skills Auditing

As you move closer to visualising your ideal situation, you will probably begin to locate some gaps in your skillset. Don’t panic. No one knows everything, and with the endless resources on the internet, it has never been easier to learn something new.

Begin with identifying the skills you already have. List both soft skills like communication, adaptability, and time management, as well as hard skills such as project management, sales, or digital marketing.

Next, explore job vacancies for roles of companies you would love to work for in the future. What skills are they looking for that you don’t yet possess? Identify the most important and consider what time and financial investment you would need to learn them.

For most things, there are online resources such as boot camps, courses, or free guides. Here are some options depending on your budget:

Free or Low-Cost Options

1. Hubspot
   • Cost: Free
   • Description: Offers a wide array of courses and certifications to begin learning a new skill without a financial investment.
2. edX
   • Cost: Free to audit; certificates and some courses have fees (typically $50-$300)
   • Description: Provides university-level courses in a variety of disciplines. You can audit many courses for free or pay for a certificate.

Mid-Range Options

1. Udemy
   • Cost: Courses typically range from $10 to $200 (with frequent sales and discounts)
   • Description: A vast marketplace for learning with courses on a wide range of subjects. Prices vary, but there are frequent discounts.
2. Skillshare
   • Cost: $15 per month or $99 per year (with free trial available)
   • Description: Focuses on creative and entrepreneurial skills. Offers a subscription model with access to all courses.

Premium Options

1. MasterClass
   • Cost: $120 per year (annual membership for all access)
   • Description: Features courses taught by world-renowned experts in various fields, such as writing, cooking, acting, and more.

You may also want to consider a more long-term option such as going back to school or taking a year-long certification. There can often be shame or fear associated with going back into education, however, this could not be further from the truth.

Going back to school is an act of self-love. It is courageous to put so much investment into yourself and your future and usually has a quantifiable return on that investment in terms of improving your career prospects in terms of finances and fulfilment.

Gaining Experience

Starting something new will come with an element of self-humbling. No matter how established you were in your previous role, making a transition requires you to step down in level and accept that you are a beginner.

To give yourself the best chance of success, begin by actively searching out opportunities for experience in your desired direction. Not only will this help you to secure more work in the future, but it also gives you the chance to test out your new potential role.

Start small with volunteering, part-time work, or unpaid projects to improve your confidence and give you a taste of what it might be like to do this type of work in the long term. Ask questions, seek information, and network with those you come across in the field.

You can also use this opportunity to gain valuable assets like references, portfolio pieces, and testimonials.

It can be challenging to put yourself out there as a beginner, so lean into the fact that you are learning. People love free work, try reaching out to companies you love, post in Facebook groups in your niche, and look on LinkedIn for professionals you aspire to be like.

Don’t hold back because you are ‘embarrassed’ of people knowing you are trying something new. Age is just a number, and you might be surprised to find out how many others have shifted careers later in life.

Exploring Mentorship

Does the phrase ‘I don’t know what to do?’ feel familiar? Perhaps you have worked through all the stages above, but still feel that lingering sense of uncertainty. Holding the responsibility for your entire future is heavy. So why not share it?

Finding a mentor can completely change your life when it comes to feeling lost. This may be someone that you aspire to be like, or a person in a role you would love to one day have. A mentor acts as a supporter through your journey, giving you advice based on their experience to help lead you on a similar track.

Finding the right mentor is often tricky. It requires you to actively ask around, look for mentorship programs, or even cold email to ask if someone would be open to the conversation.

If you cannot find the right mentor, coaching could be another option. There are coaches in all niches of personal and professional life whose goal is to help you find direction and work with you to create your actionable plan for fulfilment.

You can read more about the role of coaches here.

It’s important to remember that life is a journey. You are constantly changing, and the path you created for yourself in previous years isn’t always going to be the path you want to be on today. The longer it takes to accept that, the more difficult it is to change it.

If you are feeling overwhelmed and lost, I promise that you are not alone.

READ MORE: Finding Purpose in Your 20s

This is just the start of your next journey, and in the years to come, you are going to look back and be grateful that you allowed yourself to try something new.

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